Because I Said So!

 I used to get so frustrated when I would ask my mom something, and her reply would be-Because I Said So! I thought-What does that even MEAN! Now, many years later, I find myself saying those words more often then I ever thought possible.

I'm so proud of my children for being strong, independent little humans, and teach them to think for themselves. Up until now, that has worked good for the most part! Klaire, my 8 1/2 year old, has developed quite the attitude in the last month or two. She is easily upset by anything and everything, throws tantrums like a toddler at times, and has taken to telling me No when she doesn't want to help do something. I have been so frustrated lately because I'm not sure what else to do at this juncture, as we're heading into the Pre-Teen years and Adolescence.

Luckily, I have several older Mom friends who are in the throws of the teenage years who have offered some helpful advice, unlike my mother. This past weekend we were visiting her when Klaire became upset and started arguing with me. She smiled and shook her head, "See-it hasn't even begun. Just wait, she'll be just like you-but worse!!" Again-not helpful mom! Still, my friend Aimee is on her third teenager and has experienced a plethora of obstacles with her children. 

One night as we walked, she stopped and hugged me. Not only have we worked for years together in Early Childhood, but now I'm experiencing all of the mom struggles that she has had over the years! I'm so thankful for her and our friendship, because I know I can talk with her about anything and everything-with OUT being judged. She told me some invaluable information. 

There is really NOTHING that will prepare you for your children becoming teenagers. Especially now, with the way the world is changing. Ultimately, nobody can tell you the best way to do it, but know this-talk. Be honest. Truthful. Communicated. And be there for them-no matter what! Let alone all of the obvious physical changes, there are so many more mental things happening, it's hard for them to know which way is up. If you can keep an honest line of communication open with them, and allow them to learn on their own (Make their own mistakes!) then that will help carry you through many circumstances. Somehow it has helped the kids know that I don't really know how to "do life" right now either-she joked! 

From a developmental stand point, I'm aware of so many of the physical development changes that occur, such as brain chemistry, risky behavior, and of course the dreaded puberty portion of adolescence. But what worries me the most is knowing that my children are safe and feel like they can trust me with anything. 

So coming from a mom with lots of experience with babies, I think the same can be said for the mother of teenagers! Pray for them :) Never pass judgement. Offer words of meaningful advice or something as little as a kind smile, because honestly? None of us knows what we're doing-we're just figuring it out one day at a time.